Last week I wrote a quick note into my calendar: “Write blog post about friendship” – because this week it’s all about friendship on Elinlights. And I have so much to say about friendships! I’ve had a lot of friends! Inseparable friends at school, party friends throughout university and soulmates I thought I couldn’t live without. So this should be an easy task – “write a blog post about friendship”. But it’s not.
The truth is: The longer I am around, the more I realise: I know nothing. I know nothing about friendships. Every friendship is different as every friend is a different person. Friends come and go as you are going through different stages of your life.
At school we think we are inseparable for life, until we graduate. At university we think we’ll never stop partying and getting wasted, until we suddenly find ourselves in a relationship with a boy and start taking our marks seriously. We realise that we have nothing in common but partying and chatting about men. We meet our soul mate and best friend, we hang out 24/7 and then we fall asleep in the same bed together – at 6 in the morning, because we couldn’t stop talking through the night over a bottle of wine. We know how they like their coffee the next morning and we start adjusting our habits to fit better into their lives. We start dressing the same and wearing our hair the same and we start speaking the same and acting the same way. We mirror each other until people can’t tell anymore who is who and confuse us in the supermarket. The break-up is worse than a break-up with a man could ever be. Friendships like that leave us behind heart-broken and devastated, quite possibly for a decade – alongside with serious commitment and trust issues. Others, we forget about the day after we decided to end it – because they were just unnecessary dead weight in our lives all along. There are people who we are friends with for over a decade, until we don’t recognise each other anymore.Then again, there are friends we like a lot, but we don’t stay in touch with – for no reason at all, and Facebook friends who wouldn’t even say hi to us if they saw us on the street, or even at a party.
I could continue this list forever, but like I said: Every friendship is different, as every person involved in it is their own individual. One thing they have in common is: They come and go. “Forever” becomes a bigger word as the years pass on.
Now I am thinking about it, all I know about friendship is not nothing, because I know one thing: If you have friends who are none of the above, grab them and hold them tight and never let go.
If you follow my Facebook page you will know that this week’s highlight is my giveaway of a free “bridesmaids shoot” to honour true friendships, for the first three to book. All you need to do is to write me an email
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